I'm a part of a fairly informal in-person community of 40 people exactly. We're all common acquaintances but we're going to be working together in the future and want to bond before then. Within this group of 40 people, there is no leader of any type; it's just a bunch of us that meet up in person to get to know each other better. This is a physical community, but we also have a group on Facebook Messenger that we use to communicate and chat generally (as we share a lot of the same interests).

About a week ago, one of the members suggested creating a group on another platform to help us grow closer (a different format from Messenger that has its own merits). However, it was discovered as we were adding people that the limit to a group is 32 users, leaving 8 of us out (including me).

I do understand that not every member can be included in everything, but I as a member feel left out of a group that I would like to become closer acquainted with. From what I've gathered, I'm only missing out on a little by not being a part of this group, but it seems harmful to such a young community to already segment ourselves.

I've dropped hints about this issue before, but no one seemed to acknowledge the it. With no formal leadership, short of raising a giant fuss, is there really anything I can do? The only feasible solution would be to stick exclusively to Facebook Messenger, but it feels a little petty to ask people to stop using a platform because of a small handful of users.

2 Answers 2


It would seem that the people who suggested the other platform didn't realise that there was the limit on the number of people. If it was only discovered as people were added then it appears to be just bad luck that you were in the last 8.

I suspect that if you raise the issue then people will realise what's happened and abandon the new platform and either go back to Facebook Messenger or find a different platform.

If you can, get one (or more) of the 32 in the new group to make the suggestion. This will hopefully prevent anyone seeing the request as "sour grapes" or whining.


sub-grouping is the term which you may refer to your question. It happens and common phenomena, therefore alike 32 members remaining 8 should focus what they have to, the idea raised that's why you are with a question. should be open for all 40 to switch either way

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